When a friend or relative loses someone close, it’s not easy knowing how to ease their grief. You want to help, but how? With the best intentions in mind, most people send flowers. But flowers are temporary and one bouquet often blends into the next when they arrive in abundance. So, what can you give that will last, have meaning and offer support to someone who’s suffering?
These 5 touching and special gift ideas may help.
We all know tea is a comfort drink. And rosemary symbolizes love and remembrance. Steeped in thousands of years of myth and tradition, it’s also known to have magic and healing virtues. Herbalists often use it as a tonic to help with fatigue and over-exertion and it’s loved all around the world for its uplifting aroma and unmistakable flavour.
A collection of memories.
When we lose people close to us, we like to take time to remember their lives, why we love them and what they mean to us. You may have photos or mementos your friend or relative hasn’t seen before. Ask around and see if you can collate some special memories to put together in an album or scrapbook. You could add a personal touch or theme that was special and relative to the person deceased.
Donate to the cause.
When someone is taken early because of illness or accident, there’s often a feeling of hopelessness. By donating to a relevant charity in the deceased’s name, you not only offer comfort to their family but you proactively support the cause which can alleviate feelings of despair.
Adopt a bench.
When we’re grieving, it helps to visit a place that was special to the person we have lost to reflect and remember. Many parks and councils offer the opportunity to adopt a bench in their honour, which can be a touching communal or family gift that creates a lasting memory.
Name a star.
While naming a star doesn’t actually mean you own that star (it only registers the star within the database of the company you buy the certificate through), this can be a comforting gesture for grieving children. Children grieve differently to adults. And really young children find it hard to understand death. By naming a star, they have something physical to look at and seek comfort from which represents the person they are missing.
There’s no magic cure.
When a friend or relative loses someone they love, it’s painful. This type of grief can’t be fixed, repaired or solved and unfortunately you just can’t take the pain away. You can only love and support and be there.
People grieve in different ways. It’s a personal experience, one that belongs entirely to the person experiencing it. Sometimes, the people grieving feel awkward because friends don’t know what to say or how to behave, which only adds to their despair. Giving something you have truly put thought into reminds them you care and that you’re there for them if they need you.
Aside from your love and support, it is time that heals. In their own time, your friend or relative’s pain will become more bearable.